I was Suckered from Sucker Punch

I just saw Sucker Punch and I have to give Zack credit for putting something (semi) original on screen. He’s very good at visual guts and glory scenes, but story? Not so much.

The main girl, Babydoll, gets thrown in an insane asylum for girls. Think Annie’s orphanage for the wicked.  

 She is going to get lobotomize for being “crazy”, but it’s that moment she retreats into her mind. There, in some form, Badydoll is in a Showgirls-ish playhouse where she and other girls are dancers for money (i.e. Tina Turner’s Private Dancer).

Later, she learns that she has the power of psychic/mystic dance (like Spiral from Mojoworld) that allows her mesmerizes her suitors to get 5 special items for freedom. She gets help from the other crazy girls: Rockett, Amber, Blondie and Sweet Pea to follow her into another fantasy world. The goal is total freedom through sacrifice and garter belts.

I know this is confusing, but think how it felt sitting in the theater watching this. Anywho, I thought this was an artistic mess; however, I’m going to give you my review in classic bullet point form! Get Excited!

·      Again, it was a pretty film to watch… Without the sound.

·      The pieces of the story didn’t make sense. The 3 tier mind f**k was a bit confusing and a bit much.

·      They kept talking about empowerment, but all I saw was sexy girls in SuperHo outfits listening and catering to men. No Xena here!

·      The fantasy pieces were not cute. They were very confined to guns, ninjas, dragons and robots. Basically, these were straight teenaged boy fantasies and not really the fantasies of Babydoll. And, the fight scenes were okay, just okay.

·      The soundtrack was not on par with the movie. By the way, the movie was set in the 1930’s, however we got 2 songs from ‘Fight Club’ and ‘The Craft’. Also the music was all a cliché of action movies.

·      The 2^nd tier fantasy never really explained why they were dancers or why Babydoll’s dances were that powerful.

·      My partner was so upset with this movie that he walked out midway through.

·      This film was a live action video game. All action, nowhere to go.

·      If Freddy Krueger were in this movie, it would have been the best ‘Nightmare on Elm Street’ ever.

I recommend you to not see this film. It's pretty much Sailor Moon for horny teen boys.