So far, I really struggle with Gay 'dating' apps. I think these apps bring out the worst in us and limits our perceptions of men down to shallow labels and bathroom pics.
But what really gets me is how men of color are perceived and treated. On these apps, we witness some of the harshest views and attitudes from our community. Let me share some the top issues some of us have experienced.
- Being ignored for weeks on this apps
- Only being contacted to fulfill a fantasy or a dare
- Men only seeing you as the stereotype. EX: You can say your are a bottom, but your messages from a bunch of guys wanting you to be their top
- Men will not allow you to be anything outside of their ignorant perceptions
- You are not considered relationship material, just an one night stand
- Your dick size is an automatic deal breaker even before you discuss it
- You are sometimes considered the last resort
- If you are educated or have an opinion you are labeled as too dramatic
- Your body type never fits the status quo
- It is assumed that you are carrying some STD. Sometimes, you are asked if you been tested before anything sexual comes up
I'm hoping things will change, but I'm not so sure that it will.
3 comments:
I've always been leery about online dating ever since I gave Match.com a spin about a dozen years ago.
I'm not surprised about this at all. Regardless of sexual orientation or gender, it's a real turnoff when you're reduced to being nothing more than a hookup.
I have never used an app. The last time I used a dating tool was Match.com about 7yrs ago. Everything you listed was just about everything I experienced when a white male answered my online ad. It isn't the tools used, it is the community.
By the way, I did meet my partner from the Match.com ad and we have been together for 6 yrs. It is a numbers game, so stick to your guns, don't settle, keep your head up and it will happen for you (usually when you are not looking, was not feeling my partner AT ALL the first few contacts).
P.S. I greatly enjoy your blog!
Every guy I meet runs off on me.
Every time on the town I have to chase the cars because they wont stop,
I get so sick of my friends saying " Lucifer, you have to get in the car not chase it" . I'm blabbing aren't I sorry
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