Dan Savage's Response to the use of F-Word just got Worse

In a response to GOProud and the use of the F-word, Dan Savage wrote an interesting piece.

Here's the part that baffled the frak out of me.

And "faggot" is a word I've used to describe myself (on MSNBC!), it's a term I've used to describe my husband (in books!), it's a term my friends and I use to describe each other (all the time!). "Faggot" isn't an insult in my book—that's why I had to stick the word "house" in front of it.

Really, Dan? This is your answer? If so, this is a horrible response. He doesn't think it's an insult, so he can use this word anytime, all-time.

Well, Dan... There are millions of us who would greatly disagree with you. There are millions of us who remember the first time we heard that word. We remember the impact of the F-word and how deep that word cut when it was hurled at us.

But for you to think of it as a play name amongst friends... That's the insult. 

And the fact you head up a national campaign that views the F-word as an insult, that's really screwed up.

Dan Savage and F-Word: The Responses

So I wrote a piece about Dan Savage and his use of the F-word. I had a lot responses via e-mail and Twitter, but a good chunk of them were defending Dan.

I have to say I was shocked, mostly by the reasons they were giving me.

- Some were saying that it was fair because it was a gay man addressing another gay man.
- Or that Dan has done so much for us that he can say whatever he wants.
- And he should go after GOProud, they deserved it.

Well, that's cute, but not good reasons. In fact, they are cheap excuses I have to address.

1.  I think it's horrible for a gay person to attack another gay person with the F-word. It's done out of anger and it's geared to hurt.
2. Dan is not the gay messiah, so stop treating him like one. He's just an outspoken sex columnist. There are far more effective leaders in our community with more accomplishments and less foot-in-mouthritis.
3. And this ain't about GOProud. It was interesting to see how folks blamed GOProud on why Dan used the F-word. It's not their fault, it's Dan's. He wasn't thinking and he said something stupid. Pure and simple.
4. Stop trying to make Dan the victim, just hold him accountable.
5. Defending him opens the door to the Double Standard room. And there's no integrity in the Double Standard room.

 I know he's a hero to some, but heroes have their flaws. In order for them to be better at their game, they have to grow from their mistakes. And if you are a true fan of his, you should help him do better.

Dan Savage, Using 'House Faggot' is Not Okay

 **I wrote this for Bilerico too**

Yesterday, GOProud announced their support for Mitt Romney. They put out a press release and took a couple pics to show their declaration. Well, after that announcement, Dan Savage went on Twitter and tweeted his response.

He said: "The GOP's house faggots grab their ankles, right on cue."
Interesting quote to say the least. Dan was so upset that he just had to use the word "faggot" in his tweet.

Now, I know there are Dan fans that will say: "That's Dan," and "That's Dan style, he has always been that way." Okay, but it is still unacceptable. Dan's use of the F-word punches holes in his credibility. How are you going to tell millions of LGBT youth that the F-word is horrible and then turn around use towards another gay person?

I don't care if he was angry, it was still a stupid thing to say. And I'm a little bothered about how quiet the blogosphere is about this. If GOProud's co-founder Chris Barron had said the exact same thing, there would have been smoke in the city. In fact, the majority of the gay blogs would have made a mini-series out of the matter.
Dan should be held accountable for the using F-word. In fact, I would like to see GLAAD address the issue. They usually call out celebrities for using homophobic language in the media, so the least they can do is ask him for an apology. To ignore Dan's statement basically says that certain people have the right to use hateful statements. I'm sorry, but we can not allow that. No one should have pass to say the F-word.

If we want people to take our battle and cause seriously, we have to do the same. So I challenge us to hold Dan Savage accountable for his poor use of words. There was no excuse for it and we shouldn't try to provide one for him.