I can’t speak for all gay men, but I can tell you what I have faced as an overweight gay man. I can tell you that when I lost 15 pounds due to depression, a well-meaning older gay man told me I had done the right thing, because my only other option would have been to gain weight and become a bear. I can tell you that one person I tried to date helpfully offered, “You could be really attractive if you lost some weight.” And I can tell you that I deleted Grindr after one night when a stranger messaged me to let me know that if I shed a few pounds I “might actually be cute.”Sad, but true article.
It would be comforting to dismiss these as isolated incidents, but based on conversations with other gay men like me, I don’t think they’re all that unusual. The truth is, the gay community isn’t interested in embracing overweight people because we’re a blemish on the image of perfection. And much in the same way progressives as a whole can get away with ignoring anti-fat bigotry, gay men never bother examining the way they treat their overweight brothers. Ignore us or relegate us to the butt of hackneyed jokes: We just don’t matter. It doesn’t get better for us.
source
4 comments:
While his experience may be true, I have never had those comments made to me and I have never been thin or muscular, it is not GAY men making the judgement it is MEN. Ask any woman.
There is too much blame put on sexuality and not enough on gender.
It's very true.
One reason I don't visit BosMan's blog anymore is because of the iPhone fat shaming he did awhile back. He took a photo of a woman whose ass took up more than her chair. Not only he but his commenters had a little fun with her size.
Even if I were thin, I'd still be pissed off about it.
No Sean - I dont get ANY flack from my straight male friends for my weight. Or from straight men at my office.
Gay men - all the time.
PS Huntress - can you point me in the direction of that blog post please??
Thank you.
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