10 Things I learned from some Members of GetEQUAL

So over at Bilerico Project, I wrote a piece that questioned GetEQUAL's ideas. It started with an article with one of their directors talking about protesting President Obama. Well, I thought it was silly of them to waste all that money and resources attacking him and leaving our enemies home free.

After my post hit, they got mad at me. I didn't care, I knew they would. However, during this back and forth, I learned a lot about dealing with these folks.

1. They use quotes from civil rights leaders like they are spells. I felt like I was Nancy from "The Craft" getting some binding spell thrown on me.
2. If you question their tactics or strategy, then you are insulting them in a Klingon kind of way. It's blasphemy to question GetEQUAL's skills. If you read some their responses, they claimed they were insulted. Personally, I thought those parts were funny.
3. They love using GetEQUAL as their middle names. A bit cult-ish, but if I could, I would put Louis Vuitton as a middle name.
4. If you quote one of their leaders/directors from any media, disregard it. According to GetEQUAL, you have to 2nd guess that statement and find one of the members to clarify it. Basically, if I'm told to 2nd guess your leadership, then that spells DISORGANIZATION.
5. A bunch of angry activists doesn't ensure leadership.
6. They suffer from the worst case of tunnel vision.
7. GetEQUAL has protested the president more than any of our opponents.
8. In fact, they have staged sit-ins and interruption to our biggest allies, but to our enemies, they just shouted outside of their events. EX: They protest outside of Rick Perry's prayer event. It seems they show our enemies a little more respect.
9. They gave me so much flak, but no answers.
10. They need strong leadership to keep them in line. If they don't get it together, they will be gone in 5 years.

My Rant: Did we Read the Same Post?

In my latest piece in Bilerico Project, I wrote about full equality, not just marriage equality, should be our focus as a community. However, some folks got lost with my statement here:

  While gay marriage is cute for a privileged few, it is not a priority to many others.

My use of "cute" really bothered some people. They thought I was dismissing gay marriage, but the thing is, I wasn't. My statement "gay marriage is cute for a privileged few," was meant to point out how it's a privilege to not worry about your employment, housing, or benefits and you can only focus on marriage.

And speaking of "a privileged few", that's me. I am that PF. I have a job that allows me to talk freely about my partner, put him on my insurance and to reap my benefits; and he can do the same at his job.  They are many out there who don't have these opportunities. I want to make sure that they do. With a full equality plank, all in our community can reap the benefits.

I thought it was clear I was talking about full equality, but these folks just read what they wanted to read.

The interesting pieces to their rants against me proved 2 things:

1. They didn't read the full article, they got caught up with the word "cute" and they totally missed the message.
2. They proved my point in my post. They are so focused on gay marriage, they can't see anything else.

I appreciate opposing views, but to claim that I'm trying to divide the community or that I'm being dismissive is far from the truth.
If they can get past their own foolishness, they will see that I want the same thing they want. Full equality.

NOM's Summer Tour: Foolishness on Tap

Just watch...


And this nugget, here


Mess

Lt. Dan Choi back to Work

Good News for Lt. Dan!

This past weekend, Lt. Dan Choi was suppose to speak at the Creating Change conference, but had to cancel his appearance.

Why?

Because he was called back to duty!

Bilerico Project reports:

The workshop attendees were given the explanation that the reason for Lt. Choi's absence was that he was called back for duty, and he had to attend training with his unit which happened to conflict with Creating Change. This of course led to a lot of confusion for the delegates about what was going on, including myself, who had always thought that Lt. Choi was discharged and no longer able to serve.

To clear everything up for our readers, I spoke to Lt. Choi at length earlier about what exactly the situation is. Apparently, Lt. Choi's commander has always been in full support of him, and even after Lt. Choi came out on The Rachel Maddow Show, his commander did not press for his discharge. The military did eventually serve Lt. Choi a discharge notification - essentially firing him from his job, but he was allowed to fight this at trial, and as it currently stands, the discharge has not been finalized. Given the current state of how DADT is in such flux, and also, in my opinion, the prominence and celebrity of Lt. Choi, his discharge might never be fully enforced.

This is good. Hopefully Dan will continue his advocacy for gay & lesbian soldiers.

A Transphobic Post sparks Drama

On The Bilerico Project, a well respected LGBT blog, a post about Transgender people started up something fierce.

The post is called, "No" to the notion of Transgender, written by Ronald Gold. In this post, he writes:

So where does that put the concept of transgender? In my view, down the tubes! And that leaves the further questions of how transsexuals got to think the way they do, and what to do to resolve their dilemmas. I hope I'll be forgiven for rejecting as just plain silly the idea that some cosmic accident just turned these people into changelings. What happened, more than likely, is that, from an early age, when they discovered that their personalities didn't jibe with what little boys and girls are supposed to want and do and feel, they just assumed they mustn't be real little boys and girls.

After this was published, many readers expressed their anger and frustration over the post and TBP's choice to upload it.

Bil Browing added this at the beginning of the post:

All posts published on Bilerico Project do not reflect the opinions of nor any endorsement by the Editorial Team. Many Bilerico readers and contributors have found Ronald Gold's op-ed offensive or needlessly coarse. The idea behind Bilerico Project is to encourage dialogue among different facets of the LGBT community that might normally never interact this intimately. We encourage all readers to continue responding to Mr. Gold in the same spirit his post was written - with positive intent while bluntly stating your own opinion and experiences.

After I read it, I thought it was a joke. It felt like Ronald was thinking out loud and putting it on the screen. I wish Bil would have challenged Ronald to rethink this post. I know he want diverse views on the blog, but he has to remember what his site represents. Many LGBT folks go there to feel supported, gain knowledge and strengthen their spirits; a post like Ronald's could've easily changed.

This was not a good moment for TBP, but I hope there were some lessons learned.

Jared Polis gives us Real Talk about LGBT legislation

Congressman Jared Polis talks about the of LGBT state of affairs with Bilerico Project Editor-In-Chief, Bil Browning.

Something that got me was Jared's point about DOMA. He said in order to erase DOMA we need to win marriage equality in more states.

This was real talk. A great discussion.